Thursday, August 22, 2013

I'm Becoming a Super Hero


Happy Thursday, Internet World!

Heart News:


Not much. No big revelations at the moment. I had several tests done last week: sleep study, pulmonary function test, VQ scan, whole body scan and chest xray - whew!


Waiting to meet with the Adult Congenital Heart Defect Doctor, but that's not scheduled until Sept 24. I am on a cancellation list, so hopefully I'll get in sooner. Then I will still need the heart cath and who knows from there!

My body is extremely stressed and having a hard time just keeping me alive, so every little thing that tries to get in, gets in. Since this all started I've gotten several abscesses, a sty in my eye, a weird bruised feeling on the back of my head (with no bruise) and now an itchy rash over my entire body.

This is my "done" face:



Life Pro Tip: Don't get a serious heart condition. It's not fun stuff.

However, throughout this whole process, I am convinced I'm slowly turning into a super hero.

Phase 1: Testing and monitoring.

First, the sleep study. I wish I had a picture, you guys! I had 20 wires attached all over my body - in my hair, on my face, arms, legs. I had straps around my waist and chest. I also had to wear 2 cannula in my nose at 1 time! (one for the oxygen, which is my normal one. The other was to monitor the oxygen coming in, which is worn for the test). I looked like a straight up alien. Then someone watched me sleep.  


Phase 2: More testing, liquid ingestion

During the pulmonary test, I was sat in a clear plastic tube with a mouth piece attached and forced to do breathing exercises. Then I was given a breathing treatment. It was a vapor. They said it was albuterol, but I don't actually have proof of this. All I know is it was a blue liquid. Blue liquid is always involved with turning into a super hero, right?! ;)



Phase 3: Radioactive

For the VQ test, I was laid on a bed, with large, square cameras surrounding me (super close to me). First they put a mask over my nose and mouth and had me inhale a radioactive gas. Next they injected me with a radioactive liquid.

They said there were "no side effects" and it was for the testing. But they can say anything.

Who knows what will happen now....



Here's what I've been thinking though, what kind of super hero will I be? Let's look at popular super heroes these days:

I cannot be any of the following:

Iron Man


Wolverine


Magneto


I'm allergic to metal. Unless they get rid of that, too, that doesn't look promising.

No to Spiderman. Arachnophobia - I'm not down for that.



Let's hope not Batman. He's kickass, but his parents are dead and I want none of that.


Black Widow is pretty cool.


But leather is not going to be flattering on me. Plus I sweat a lot. All I can think of is this scene from Friends.

  Captain America... I'm not so much for the walking flag look.


Don't get me wrong, Chris Evans is hot, but the outfit is not for me.

Plus, I'm too lazy to carry around that shield. Which would also take out Thor.



I'm thinking Mystique.



I know she's on the bad side for X-Men, but really, she could go either way. So I could be super hero or super villain. Plus, the younger version was played by Jennifer Lawrence and I just love everything about her.



I also like Loki, even though he's a villain, too. He's a trickster and he can be in two places at once, which is just awesome. Plus, Tom Hiddleston is adorable (which is just a side note)




On the other hand, I'm more likely to turn out like Bruce Banner/Hulk. Too much radio activity, I'm a big girl and I'm not super graceful, so I'll probably start smashing things.



Of course, I'll be my own super hero, but it will mostly be like "Super Lazy" and that's just less fun!

HULK SMASH! 

J

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