Overwhelming Goodness: My Crazy Brain

Have you ever been so overwhelmed with good things that you don't know what to do with yourself, but you feel like you can't complain because it's good stuff and people who complain about good stuff are annoying and stupid, so you just let yourself get overwhelmed until your brain shuts down and you write crazy long run-on sentences that you really hate reading when other people do it?

No? Just me?


Well, good thing this is my blog then, eh?

I have a lot of good stuff going on right now and straight off the bat, I want to say that I am totally grateful for all of it. I'm completely blessed and I'm fully aware that I don't deserve any of it.


That being said, I don't even know how to function. Haha.

Here's what's going on in my neck of the woods (thanks, Al Roker!)

On July 7 (ish, maybe before, we'll see), I'm finally moving out of my parents house! I love my parents and all, but I'm 25 so this is well over due. I'm moving into a condo with my friend Kelsey and though it's only a temporary gig (she's getting married next year), it will be nice to be out on my own.

It's a super great deal and because she already lives there, I don't have to worry about furnishing a whole place, just buying a few new things. Awesome.


On July 13 I'm heading for a weekend trip to Toronto (finally!) to stay with my good friend Raf and also see Matt. It's well over due as well, so I'm super excited we have a date set so I can see my boys!! Plus, I'm hoping to do a few more visits before winter comes and the weather gets bad.

 Rafael

Matt

On July 21 I leave for a 2-week European Adventure with my amazing cousin, Jaclyn. I know you've heard it before, but we're going to Greece, Czech Republic, Slovakia, Poland, Hungary and Croatia and it's going to be the trip of a lifetime!

How gorgeous is my cousin, Jaclyn?

On August 17 we have a family vacation weekend with my immediate family. We'll be heading out to a cottage by the lake and it's sure to be a great time.

In November I'll be going to Amsterdam for a work training and heading back to Amsterdam again in December for a work Christmas party. How lucky am I to work for an international company who will send me across the ocean for training and partying?!?

So many great things are happening and I love it. 


At the same time, my mom asked me today if I was excited about moving and excited about my trip.


My answer? Not really.

Now hold on a second. It's not that I'm really not excited. It's that there is so much coming up, so many details, so much to plan, etc. etc. that my mind is going "oh hey, you know all the major stuff coming up? Yeah, I'm just going to pretend that's not happening. Cool?"

I'm an over-achieving, over-analyzing, over-planning perfectionist. On top of that, I'm trying to get all that "over-ness" in the right balance. So I'm trying to "go with the flow," relax and not stress as much.

But since I'm not used to that, my brain takes that as "meh." 

So, in all reality, I'm crazy excited about everything. I'm super happy, endlessly grateful and abundantly blessed. I know I am going to have some amazing experiences and awesome stories that I look forward to sharing with you all. 

But for right now, in order to cope with all this goodness, I feel all "Matthew McConaughey" about it. And by that I mean, chill, relaxed, whatever, "right on man, that sounds good." 

Also, this does not compare with the post I did about my mom and my dad totally deserves his own post because he rocks, but Happy Father's Day to my awesome dad! I love you!! ♥

J

Paradox: Story of My Life

Don’t worry, I’m not actually going to share the entire story of my life. No way am I going to cover all 26 years in one post, I’m too fascinating for that. 

However, this is more like when people say a simple phrase like “ugh, I’m always missing the bus!” and another person says “story of my life.”

The story of my life? I’m full of paradoxes. 

I embrace my paradoxes and all the frustration that follows to keep myself and you all entertained.

You’re welcome.

Hard-working & Lazy

I am a very hard worker. I help others, taken on extra responsibility and get shit done. 

But

I’m extremely lazy. Sometimes I don’t go to the bathroom when I need to because I don’t want to walk my lazy ass to the bathroom. True story.

Liberal & Traditional

I’ve touched on this before, but I am both liberal and traditional. It just depends on the topic. Instead of claiming one end of the spectrum or the other, I’m swimming in the gray, living in the paradox.

Here are some examples:

Traditional: Taking my husband’s last name, being a stay-at-home mom (if financially possible), and modesty. 

Liberal: my tattoos, my 100% support gay rights/marriage, my inappropriate humor.

*To each their own, no judgement to those who feel differently, these are just a few of my own personal traditional & liberal areas.

Perfectionist & Messy

In so many ways I am a perfectionist. I like things to have their place, I want my work done right and I’m very specific about spelling/grammar (mostly spelling and word use). 

On the other hand, I’m pretty messy. Mostly when it comes to my room and partially due to my laziness, I just don’t care. I mean, I care a little, but not enough to do something about it.

If it doesn’t make sense to you how I could be an “everything has its place” person as well as a messy “I’m just going to throw this over here and forget about it” person, don’t worry. It doesn’t make sense to me either. 

Traveler & Homebody

I LOVE to travel. Seriously, it’s one of my favorite things. I want to go almost everywhere and return to the places I’ve been. There are tons of places in the USA that I want to visit and countless places around the world I would love to see before I die. 

At the same time, I’m such a homebody. I rarely go out after work, aside from appointments and errands. Even when I do have plans, they aren’t for long and then I’m back at home. On the weekends, if I don’t have plans, I like staying home all day. People see my calendar at work and think I’m constantly busy, but trust me, I’m at home in my pjs as soon as possible. Nothing better…. Except traveling ;)

Analytical & Compulsive

I’m super analytical. I want to think of every possible scenario, know every detail. Sometimes I plan my responses to conversations I may not even have. Sometimes I plan what I’m going to pack 3 months before a trip.

But then I’m also compulsive. I’ll just decide on something in 5 seconds flat and figure that I'll analyze it later. Like when I decided that I’d go to Australia by myself even though I’d never traveled internationally before then (or by myself). Or when I decided I would go to Russia with a group of people I didn’t know. 

Because why not?

Sometimes I make compulsive decisions and they even surprise me, or I look back and go “holy crap! How did I even do that… knowing me!?!”

I am a living, walking (sometimes, ha) paradox. I confuse others and myself because I’m so contradictory. But it makes life interesting. And if there’s one thing I don’t want, it’s a boring life. Well… maybe boring and interesting all at once…. ;)